The human experience, in all its glory is a painful one. I have always held the belief that when a baby is born it cries for the rude awakening that is birth.
The fetus lives in the womb for nine months growing, developing, unfolding. Coming out into this world, bright light, surrounded by strange forms of life. I don’t blame the kids’ hysteric. This goes on by being rejected by your mother as she tries to ween you off breastfeeding or training you to sleep in your own bed, knowing your fear of being alone and all that lurks in the dark. Most of which is imaginary. Painful, but imaginary.
So what is it?
Why does it exist?
If it is a part of life, why is necessary?
What role does pain have in the human experience?
The best way to explain it is:
A mother can’t be unless she gives her body to nurture the fetus, (and suffer excruciating pain) to bring that baby into the world. It’s not just baby that’s born, its’s a whole family.Life will present painful and uncomfortable situations over and over again but it’s really just a cycle that’s almost like birth:
You are born into this world to experience new realities the first of which is the cold environment and the bright light you’re exposed to compared the warmth and dim light of the womb. As your progress in this existence you will experience situations demanding you leave your comfort zone in order to experience growth.
Over the years, beneath layers and layers of pain, man has made it a rule to avoid hurt and pain as much as possible. The goal: a painless existence. Like every other emotion pain is an entity within itself. It has a purpose to fulfill. It has a right to be felt. The reason it hurts so much sometimes is because it has to demand the attention, make itself known in unnecessary ways just to be felt.
Can the world exist without pain?
Can we?
No.
Why?
As long as we’re human we’re going to experience pain.
How do people know they need to cover a wound? Because they bleed, bruise or burn. Without the feeling of pain and a threat to our survival we wouldn’t feel the pressure to grow and the need to survive. Pain, inner pain, emotional pain, acts to indicate the need to grow, change something, heal some part of ourselves.
In the same way, pain within indicates that something is not right.
Pain is a teacher, testing you, your skillset, your limits, patience, prayer, belief system. It tests your courage and bravery as to how far you would go, how much are you willing to risk to keep your world together, yourself together, all the while it breaks down. The benefits of a breaking or broken world is that we get to rebuild - bigger, stronger, brighter.
While it would be real nice to surf the waves of happiness all day and night, everyday, all through life, there’s not chance of that happening as long as we’re human. Without pain, we wouldn’t know the joy of a sigh of relief. And if you just take one day of your life to count the many sighs of relief we take, you’d have that many reasons and more to be grateful.
The truth is, only death kills, not hardship, not pain, not grief. Only death kills a man.
As I mentioned before, pain will always be part of our experience because we’re human, but the decision to keep going is where the greatest decisions and greatest moves make its mark. I call it a vault of valuable lessons.
You are as strong as you are today because of all that life has presented to you. Though it may have seemed chaotic in those moments, you did the best you could for yourself. And if you ever feel like you could have done more, know that what you did was good enough to make it through.
Whenever you find yourself in pain, acknowledge it, be aware of it and remember, it hurts because theres a part of you that needs healing. From here on out, remember the one thing you will always have control over is how you choose to react to things. Don’t fight the pain, fight the part of you that thinks you can’t go on, can’t get through it and use that strength to feed your faith.
About
Naseeha Tayob Ibrahim
I speak. I write. I coach.
I want to make the world a better place.
As an avid reader and writer, it’s no surprise that communications became my career and line of work. There is never one thing in particular that defines who I am, except the fact that I am passionate about everything I do. That made me the odd one out most of my life. It made realize how important it is to listen to my heart.
